UPS AND DOWNS - flip flopping the schedule!

We'll go through the Weekend Wesults either later today or tomorrow, but so much else is happening that we really want to get this piece out today... because there are a TON of folks who are UP and even more who are DOWN all of a sudden...

UP - a belated UP-UP-UP to the THREE-PEAT champions of the Australian Football League, the HAWTHORN HAWKS! Coming into a Grand Final against a team that had spanked them by 31 points three weeks ago, coming in with an older roster that had to cross the country four times in three weeks while West Coast sat at home and won a pair of games before travelling to Melbourne to play in the fabled MCG, "the home of footy"...and once there, play like they were in awe of the situation, while the Hawks were in "been there, won that" mode, demolishing the Eagles in a game not unlike last year's demolition of the also high-flying Sydney Swans - a brief, half-period of hope, followed by one-and-a-half quarters of the most devastating footy you'll ever see, leaving the second half to basically be a procession to the throne for Hawthorn, unquestionably the outstanding franchise of the 21st century at this point. What's more, it was no fluke - imagining another team to outplay them next year is difficult, and probably a measure of self-destruction will be necessary for other clubs to fancy themselves as "flag favorites" at any point in 2016.

DOWN-DOWN-DOWN-DOWN to the coaches already jettisoned in the FBS, barely halfway through the season - Randy Edsell at Maryland, for whom the bell tolled last year but who survived to coach another season, only to start out 2-4 with routs from West Virginia, Ohio St and Michigan on his record. The three-TD loss to Bowling Green of the MAC was the worst of the lot, but as always, there's more to the story...With Steve Sarkisian of USC, the struggle is straightforward: alcohol abuse, combined with life stresses, pushed him well over the edge of professional behavior after a drunken appearance at a major booster event, another reported one at the Arizona St game, and the worst this Sunday when he arrived for practice completely plowed. He was immediately put on leave, and today was relieved of his duties by AD Pat Haden. His situation is different than Edsell's, especially if you believe that alcoholism is a disease, rather than purely a choice on a person's part. While the university personnel are saying all the right things - we support him in his quest to get healthy - and well they should, as we all should, it's hard for me not to look at these circumstances for a professional and say, Isn't there a line you realize you shouldn't cross long before you reach this point? Of course, he's not the first coach for whom addictions played a role in losing his "dream job" - some for their own abuses, some for abetting those of players; some for alcohol, some for drugs, some for violence, and some for sex. But somehow, somehow, there's got to be more than just sympathy for a coach who has the self-discipline to succeed in a profession that demands self-discipline more than almost any other, and yet can't find the self-discipline to curb his own addiction issues, or get help for them before they destroy him. There's got to be something more akin to responsibility for his actions, beyond the firing. Sarkisian's issues have destroyed his life - but probably only temporarily. He'll get another coaching job, and like Jim Tressel, Kelvin Sampson, and other previous disgracees, he'll resume his career. But the players, university personnel, boosters, and fans of USC football won't forget...Just added in the last few hours, two more coaches with reason to feel down - North Texas (former) head coach Dan McCarney, who was handed his pink slip today after UNT (already the creators of tier "V" in the FBS division this year for their ineptitude) not only lost as we predicted to FBS Big Sky Portland State (at home, on Homecoming of all days), but lost by the Baylor-esque score of 66-7 (actually, that's exactly the score Baylor had against Kansas Saturday. But that was BAYLOR, not a tier O, 3-2 FCS team!). It was the largest loss by an FBS (or "1-A") school to an FCS (or "1-AA") school in history. So, let's see, at least North Texas gets a break now to work a new coach in...what? They play Western Kentucky? The conference favorite? On THURSDAY? Great timing, UNT....AND last because the headliner always goes last, the Head Ball Coach himself, Steve Spurrier, retired from coaching today as South Carolina sits at 0-4 in the SEC East, 57th ranked in the country, tier J on the Following Football charts, and idiots calling for the head of the master when they aren't worthy to carry his jock strap. I feel on this one like I do on Adam Goodes being humiliated by Australian "fans" - yes, he should retire at the end of the year, and yes, if he had been an ass about it you could argue for removal then. But he single handedly made the SEC the most relevant conference in the country - he deserves a better send-off than this. I'm no Spurrier fan, but he had more football knowledge in his ball cap than I've had my entire existence.

(And by the way, one further DOWN to those idiots in Australia I just mentioned, for preventing Goodes from participating in ANY of the retired star activities that his fellow (and all lesser) stars got to do this fall (spring there) because he didn't want any booing to distract from the celebration for the others. A hero to the last, Mr. Goodes. You deserved so much better than this.)

DOWN also to poor Joe Philbin, formerly of the Miami Dolphins, who was never going to keep his job there after the issues that took place under his watch, which from our standpoint didn't seem to be his fault. But you've got to have a fall guy, and we'll guarantee 1-3 one fourth of the way through an NFL season is hardly reason to fire your coach - especially when you weren't figuring to set the world on fire to begin with. But as so often happens, when the boss wants to make a change, and the GM has the wrong players on the roster, the only one you can get rid of quickly is the coach. Good luck, Miami - here's betting the next twelve games are no better.

Loose ends from Week 8...

Savannah St fell to 0-8 yesterday, losing at North Carolina Central 42-21. They have now lost seventeen in a row...

On the flip side, the defending FCS champion North Dakota St Bison won 47-7 over South Dakota to move to 8-0, and consecutive win number 32...

The Arizona Cardinals had two 75+ yard pass plays for touchdowns, the last under two minutes to go, to beat the Philadelphia Eagles 24-20. What were the odds of the Cards being two full games up on Seattle AND San Francisco after Week 8?...

Have you seen the standings in the AFC North? All four teams are within a half-game of each other: Cincinnati at 4-2-1, Pittsburgh and Baltimore at 5-3, and Cleveland at 4-3!...

Conversely, everyone in the NFC South is below .500 - Carolina leads at 3-4-1, the Saints are at 2-4 pending tonight's game, Atlanta fell to 2-6 after leading 21-0 at halftime, and Jacksonville is...Jacksonville...

TCU scored 82 points on Texas Tech yesterday, a real FBS school. This was the highest point total of the year, surpassing North Texas' defeat of Nicholls St 77-3, which we argue SHOULD NOT COUNT because it was against an FCS team (never mind that it was an 0-9 school who lost by two TDs to a Division II team). So, for that reason, glad TCU set the new season high. (If those games don't count towards your win total for bowl games, they shouldn't count for anything else, either!)...

That wasn't the only high number put up Saturday - Georgia Southern put 69 on Georgia St (69-31), Western Kentucky beat Old Dominion 66-51, and Tier C Arizona took out Washington St 59-37, only after having shifted into low gear for the fourth quarter...

And in the FCS, not only did Alcorn St ruin the last game at Blackshaw Field for Prairie View by scoring 77 on them (winning 77-48), but Murray St laid a woodshed whoop'n on Kentucky Wesleyen 86-29... and it should've been worse, except they hung onto the ball for the last seven minutes, finishing the game by kneeling on the KW seven yard line... 

Michigan St scored a last minute TD against Michigan to stretch their winning margin to 35-11. Why? Because the Wolverine players were jerks. Apparently, they decided to 'stake' the center Spartan when they came out onto the field, always a wise move against your cross-state rival when they're 7-1 and you're falling apart at the seams. Our early candidate for stupid jerk move of the year...

In the pros, Geno Smith of the New York Jets posted one of the saddest stat lines ever before being pulled for Michael Vick (who didn't help much, either, as Buffalo creamed them): 2 for 8, for five yards, w 3 interceptions. A rating of 0.0; perfection!

On the flip side, having already lauded Ben Roethlisberger's day for the Steelers, let's check the great Tom Brady's line for the New England Patriots: 30-35 for 354 yards, five TDs and no picks. Pats beat the Bears 51-23.